anxious.

i am officially down to the one week and one day mark. and holy cow this is insane to think about. im kind of getting into freak out mode, not for fear of going or anything like that, but just that i have SO much to get done. i know i can do it, and i know everything will fall into place, but yall know me. im a worrier. so literally written in my planner, beside my bed, bathroom mirror, everywhere, i have written "dont be anxious, the lord will provide." but funny how seeing words everyday still does not make them sink in. so i just thought i would send this to those of you who are checking up on this blog thing of mine to ask for prayers against anxiousness and worrying. thanks fam!

love.

pops.

happy dads day father mike.

thanks for always making me laugh with those looks, letting me play dj, really teaching me how to drive and always loving me. youre the best, simple as that. :)

love.

be obsessed

so ive been lame and not keeping keeping people posted, but summer school and life has just been keeping me so busy! i feel like i havent stopped at all. but its ok, because me staying busy has kept my thoughts in right here and right now, instead of allowing myself to be anxious about my trip. dont get me wrong, i am STOKEEEDDDD, but for me to prepare myself i cant let the excitement of this trip keep me from learning and growing in the right now state.

like i said, im in summer school taking two classes, and i have gotten into this great habit of waking up really early before class and starting my day off with some jesus time. normally i would just do it in the afternoons, but this has been so great for me. and i have been learning

so much by just starting at the beginning of the day instead of waiting until i had other things on my mind. so ive ben reading (via an online blog) oswald chambers "my utmost for his highest." and it has been incredible for me. every morning while i am eating my honey bunches of oats (with almonds - duh!) and reading what this guys thoughts are on scriptures and really great things he feels the world should know.

todays was titled "are you obsessed with something?" and we can all think of something we are truly obsessed with. for me, its my chapstick...a total necessity for my lips. others it may be burts bees or carmex, or even good ole vaseline. ok, but for real, we all have things that we eventually become obsessed with that control our life. maybe its the need to please everyone, make money, the strongest desire to be in a relationship, obsessed with the way you look, worrying or anything. its so easy in our society to become obsessed because its what we do. but in todays thoughts, he talks about how if we are obsessed with these things we become unbelieving in god. he is so much bigger than ALL of these things...so why do we doubt him? so this is when oswald here talks about becoming obsessed with god. if we become obsessed, nothing else can affect us. god is bigger than all, so if we become obsessed with him, we have no room for anything else, but to let him do what he does to create this life he designed for us!

[ to be obsessed by god is to have an effective barricade against all the assaults of the enemy]

if we become obsessed with the lord we have far more abilities to turn over and stomp down the things the enemy has put in our life and in our heart...we have the ability to know the lord is all you need to please, money is not everything, we are his masterpiece! and no one can tell you that you are not beautiful because to the lord you are, his power can fulfill that desire for relationship because its all that he wants from us, he tells us not to worry and to see how he provides...so be obsessed in the lord. be OBSESSED!

ob.sess [uh b-ses]

-verb (used with object)

to dominate or preoccupy the thoughts, feelings or desires (of a person)

so ill leave ya with one more quote. just wanted to share what i have been learning. go and check this guy out... www.utmost.org its really great.

[god is out refuge...nothing can break through his shelter of protection]

love.

mi mamá

this morning mom woke me up early because she forgets that my church starts an hour later than hers. all she wanted to know what my blog address, but her phone call woke me up a good half hour earlier than i needed to be up. its all good though mom. because this one is for you!

meet brenda:

mom has been with me for twenty one years now. thats twenty one million "mammmmaaaa"s and three times as many hugs (you know the exact ones im talking about). she has been there for me every step of the way just being so incredible. she is not only my mom but probably the best friend anyone could ask for. she answers her phone no matter how many times i call during the day and will always be willing to come tuck me in at night. and oh yes, she will completely let me know when im just tired and need to go to bed. she encourages me everyday and never lets me forget that she is proud of who i am.

so mom, i just wanted to say thanks. thanks for being you. thanks for loving me. and thanks for everything that has yet to come.

love.

un día sin zapatos

internationally, today was TOMS shoes "one day without shoes" awareness day. basically, today was a day for anyone and everyone to leave the shoes at home and experience what its like to be a child or adult in a third world country that does not own a pair of shoes, and to also raise awareness of what the organization really stands for...not just "trendy" shoes that everyone owns, but the giving behind it. for every pair you buy, they give a pair to another person in need. such an incredible idea and organization!

so today, i walked barefoot. on the bus, all over campus, in my classrooms, in the rain, driving to blowing rock (to have small group with my wyldlife girls), to the grocery, and it was hard! i absolutely love being barefoot, but only

at my chosen time. not necessary in the bathrooms, nor on the hard cement sidewalks. as i was walking around all i could do was send prayers of thanksgiving for the simplest blessing of a pair of shoes to wear everyday of my life. i will never have to get cuts and sores day after day that will be infected to the point that it could lead to amputation. but i will tell you this. we have a beautiful sunny morning with and afternoon rain and oh boy that water felt so great. probably the best puddle jumping ive ever done. the stares and weird looks i got were fun. but worth it.

one day without shoes was a great experience and i loved being joined by friends all over. heres a fun video i found on the TOMS website. well i cant figure out how to upload a youtube video so just copy and paste and check it out :)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vlz3QKHJBac

love.

joy.

i really need to get better at this whole blogging thing...

these past couple of weeks have been absolutely insane. im in my last month of junior year and the most busiest person in the world. i have so much school work, wyldlife, summer plans to be made, projects, and the list is never ending. not meaning to complain, but im exhausted! and very much ready for april to be over with (excluding that 19th. hello birthday!). but enough complaining. life is flowing.

the weather this past week has been BEAUTIFUL! i never thought i was one of those people that got so much joy from the weather, but i am a completely different person when the sun is shining! i have had the chance to go hiking, rollerblading, taking pictures and just playing outside. but oh the pictures! im new at this whole photography thing, and i dont try to take artsy pictures, but i simply love to capture the joy of my friends for them! some people say "why are you never in pictures?" but in all honesty i am so happy to be taking them that i dont care one bit that im not in them. here is one from when 2 of my best friends from high school came to boone to play with me and anna (kindergarten buddy!) love them way too much.

and this past weekend was easter. oh what joy it was to have a few days off. i picked my sister up in charlotte and road tripped on down to st simons island to be with

the rest of the fam. i think i lost my voice after screaming random songs for 7 hours straight. krista wanted to kill me, as i wanted to break her finger after she tried to drive from the passenger seat for too many hours. shes the worst passenger! but she will be the first to admit it. dad is the ONLY person in the world she will not tell how to drive. she is a mini mike.

but easter. i have no idea why, but for the first time easter really sunk in this year. friday i found myself truly thinking of what that day was supposed to me. good friday is such a bitter sweet thing. most people just say, oh its friday, but as i drove in the car by myself for 2 hours on my way to get krista, i seriously could not get a grip of my emotions. i was listening to my jesus tunes playlist because i really wanted to understand this whole thing. i like to listen to christian music when im thinking a lot. just because.

anywho, the song "in christ alone" came on the playlist and wholly moly. i seriously started sobbing. out of no where. i was driving with the windows down, sun shining, and crying. people thought i was a fool. but i was so thankful. it was a joyful cry, out of thanksgiving, knowing that i did not deserve anything, but was given everything. and on sunday, i was in church and that was one of the songs we sang, and welp there i was, tears again. jesus is incredible, and i know its different, but its appropriate at the same time. if you think about the cross and the resurrection, to be overwhelmed with emotions of joy and sorrow. the cross would have been nothing had he not risen, had he not defeated death, and had he not done this all for us, out of love. this may not make sense, but i felt the need to share that. easter is incredible not because of the easter bunny or easter egg hunts, but for what it truly symbolizes. so i guess ill end with the lyrics of the song. enjoy!

in Christ alone my hope is found
He is my light, my strength, my song
this Cornerstone, this solid ground
firm through the fiercest drought and storm
what heights of love, what depths of peace
when fears are stilled, when strivings cease
my Comforter, my All in All
here in the love of Christ i stand

in Christ alone, who took on flesh
fullness of God in helpless babe
this gift of love and righteousness
scorned by the ones He came to save
‘til on that cross as Jesus died
the wrath of God was satisfied
for every sin on Him was laid
here in the death of Christ i live

there in the ground His body lay
Light of the world by darkness slain
then bursting forth in glorious Day
up from the grave He rose again
and as He stands in victory
sin’s curse has lost its grip on me
for i am His and He is mine
bought with the precious blood of Christ

no guilt in life, no fear in death
this is the power of Christ in me
from life’s first cry to final breath
Jesus commands my destiny
no power of hell, no scheme of man
can ever pluck me from His hand
‘til He returns or calls me home
here in the power of Christ i’ll stand

love.

my provider.

so this past weekend i went to windy gap with some crazy middle school kids and it was seriously incredible. jesus worked in so many great ways to open up girls hearts for us to have amazing real talk. i never realized some of the things that 13 and 14 year old girls were going through and struggling with till i sat there during these cabin times and listened to them pour their hearts out to me. and i felt so honored that they wanted to trust me with things that some of their best friends do not eve know.

camp was a good learning experience in so many ways and levels. the thing that i loved most was how awesome my provider was for me. you would think that after a week of crazy midterms and no sleep, then a full day at camp with less that 2 hours of sleep due to the extreme number of sleep talkers we had in that cabin, that i would have been completely exhausted. oh boy was i wrong. i was no where close. i had crazy energy and didnt even realize i was tired till my head hit the pillow. i just wouldnt let myself think about it. and the best part was that i truly saw one of my biggest prayers be answered. god provided me with this extreme energy so that i could pay attention in club and be so alert during cabin times and in the afternoon to spend all the free time we had with these girls that mean so much to me! i realized that i had this incredible provider in my life and how thankful i was for that.

so many times we dont realize how blessed we are, even for the simplest things, such as energy. or we dont realize that so may huge things flow off of one simple thing. does that make sense? like me getting energy this weekend provided me and blessed me with so many opportunities -to stay up late and have real talk, to do everything the girls wanted me to do, to be involved with entertainment night instead of taking a nap, and to get up early and stay up late in true prayer for what had happened that day or what would happen. im not going to lie, sometimes you get so caught up in camp that you dont take time to be with jesus. but if you go into things the right way, he will provide! he will provide EVERYTHING you could possibly need.

ive loved seeing that this past weekend.

and since he gave me all that energy at the gap, i am fully crashing at the beach in florida. and when i mean fully crashing, i mean being completely ready for bed at 7 and having no problem crawling in there and sleeping until the sun comes back up. ok that was 3 hours ago. so onto that process and enjoying a week away from school and snow!

love.